Movie Review: The Lazer Team

Pre-Teen Humor. Pre-Teen humor everywhere.

The Lazer Team (2016): Four losers are thrust into the position of saving the world when they stumble upon a UFO crash site and become genetically equipped to the battle suit on board.

Ok. Most of you won't care about this film. If you have no idea what Rooster Teeth is, then this definitely applies to you. So, let me first address you. The Lazer Team is a b-movie, and a bad one at that. Even though it's a quick 102 minutes, the humor is just lazy. As in it's mostly dick and butt jokes. Such originality! Wow! Never heard that one before! Nestled in between the unoriginal jokes are a few original ones, however these original jokes just aren't enough to worthy a watch for you. If you want to discover what Rooster Teeth is all about, check out their Let's Plays and Red vs. Blue series on YouTube. They are significantly more original. But now, let me address those that do care about this review: fans of Rooster Teeth. And I'll just say this: despite its extremely lackluster script, my fandom of Rooster Teeth came out and I couldn't help but have a good time watching these guys I've spent almost a third of my life with bumble around and essentially be themselves in their first feature length film.

So I think most people after watching this film will think it was ok. I certainly did. On the one hand, I had an absolute blast watching Burnie Burns, Gavin Free, and Michael Jones fumbling through the whole film. Seeing Michael pick on Gavin like he always does was like a trip through nostalgia-ville. The Rooster Teeth cameos were also really fun to watch. Joel's cameo definitely took the cake for me seeing as back in the day he was an actual actor. I just wish we would've gotten more cameos from Achievement Hunter. I waited the whole film to see my boy Ray Narvaez Jr. pop up.....but it never happened. Sad face. The other actors were all over the place, but I guess that is the result of it being a b-level film. Colton Dunn was excellent as.....um......the non-Rooster Teeth employee, but pretty much every other non-Rooster Teeth character in this film was extremely bland, especially discount Chris Evans, aka the "hunk" of the film, Alan Ritchson. Man should that character have been played by Rooster Teeth's own Blaine Gibson. Steve Shearer was also pretty bad, a character that could've been played better by the head of Rooster Teeth and the director of this film, Matt Hullum. If you haven't put two and two together yet, this film would've been a lot more enjoyable had the film used more Rooster Teeth employees. Especially since it's Rooster Teeth fans that are gonna watch this film.

The main problem with this film, though, is the script. Or lack there of. This script is terrible. There's no other way to say it. I expected so much more from Burnie Burns. I mean I get that it's not meant to be anything substantial, it is a comedy after all. But the comedy of this film is not funny either. I mean a few dick and butt jokes are fine, but holy crap that's all this film is. And you know what's worse? The blatant sequel-bait. I mean c'mon, guys. At least act like you care. The sequel bait left me feeling really empty inside after the film and made it resonate even less than it was already going to.

In short, this film is fine. I laughed from time to time, but it was only because I was trying really hard to enjoy myself. After all given how many hundreds of hours of Rooster Teeth content I've watched, how could I not enjoy this film, right? The appeal of this film is definitely only to the already-established fanbase, and just about anyone else will be sitting in as much misery watching this film as they would watching an Adam Sandler film. Rooster Teeth fans: watch it to say you did, then forget about the fact that it exists. Everyone else: stay very far away. There's a lot better ways to spend your time.

The Critique: While fans of Rooster Teeth will find enjoyment in the performances of their favorite RT employees, everyone else will not be able to get past the terrible jokes and script trying to hold it all together.

The Recommendation: Ha. Only if you're a Rooster Teeth fan. Everyone else? This film is pure snake oil.

Rewatchability: Low

The Verdict: I'm gonna go with two scores here. One for the Rooster Teeth fan, and one for everyone else.
Rooster Teeth Fan: 5/10 Average.
Everyone Else: 2/10 Garbage.


Image Credit
http://thefilmstage.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/01/03-LAZER-TEAM-Photo-Courtesy-of-Rooster-Teeth.jpg